you should know
there is a hole in me
and it ruins things
like me and you

because something got in
that didn’t belong
and when it tried to leave
it left me so open
and so cold
it became my new normal
and i didn’t know
you could feel the breeze
where my heart used to be

let me see, he said
pressing his fingers against
my aching body
in the place i used to feel
in the place i had so much light
streaming through

his touch was warm
and filled with so much electricity
it shocked me into presence
and as our eyes met
and his care met my brokenness
tears began to build
and i remembered the first time
someone looked at me
like i was who i imagined myself
to be

it’s cold, i said
the contrast between
the air and his hands
stark now

and i remembered
how before i knew
what it felt like to love
and be loved
i never missed
moments like these
because i didn’t know
it was possible
for girls like me
with a rib cage
full of memories
and day dreams
dripping in possibility

i didn’t know
i could meet another here
and feel so incompletely whole

they say you need
to love yourself first
they say you need
to be whole first

but i not so sure
because it seems to me
some healing
we simply cannot do
yes sometimes
it seems we truly need
each other

and that my friends
is beautiful
not desperate

i think the key
is just being honest
about our wounding
being revealed
about the places
we check out
go dark
and are hurt

because sometimes
the hole is yours to close
and sometimes it is the opening
for someone else to love you
in the ways you cannot yet see

we need
to heal

❤️ emily joy rosen

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