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for a lot of my twenties i walked around with a story that “no one gets me” i found myself lonely and resentful. i took every sideways glance and eye roll personally and continued to build my case for why this world was a cold and pointless place i did little talking a lot of judging… | Secret Keepers by Emily Joy Rosen

for a lot of my twenties i walked around with a story that “no one gets me”
i found myself lonely
and resentful
i took every sideways glance and eye roll personally and continued to build my case for why this world was a cold and pointless place
i did little talking
a lot of judging
and my religion was self pity
i made some beautiful art during this time
my isolation resulted in a great deal of productivity
i was prolific
and in tremendous pain

so i started to question
why
why is it that no one gets me
and it dawned on me
i never shared much of anything
rarely did i open up, share what was true for me, what i was thinking and almost never what i was feeling
now this may seem like common sense, but for me this was a profound epiphany

if i don’t show up how could anyone know me?
i was near suicide so i thought i am going to give this a try
i am going to speak up
i am going to give this sharing thing an attempt
and i started to
little by little
word by word
i began to share my inner world
it wasn’t easy
it wasn’t comfortable
i have felt intense pain
but the connection that has come through, is unequivocally worth it all
for now complete “strangers” say to me almost daily: “i feel like i know you more than people close to me and i feel like you are helping me find me”
and that right there, i wouldn’t trade for the world

❤️ emily joy rosen

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